Almost 8 weeks!

I can't believe Jackson is almost 8 weeks old! It's been an amazing 8 weeks...probably no different than for any other new parent. Paul and I are both so taken by this little guy! He can be a BEAST at times, mostly between 8pm and 1am. We struggled with feedings and had a week of trials--first, all formula, then all breast milk, finally ending up where we started: a mix of both. He's been getting a consistant 3 oz. of breast milk, and the amount of formula has increased steadily over time (he's now getting 1.5 oz. of formula mixed with the breast milk).

My issue is now about stopping the breast milk. I've been pumping 4-6 times a day for the past 2 months. I realize most women nurse a lot more than that in a day so I shouldn't complain about my measily 4-6 times. It's been torturous at times for me, having gone through 2 bouts of mastitis (infection in the breast that causes pain, fevers, etc). Luckily, with antibiotics, the infection subsides within a few days but the "best" thing for mastitis is to continue pumping, even at a more frequent rate. When that infection hits, the last thing I want is to have anything anywhere near the boobs! Aside from that, pumping is just plain awful....

...however, thinking about stopping brings on strong guilt in me. I've read and been told that anything Jackson will get nutritionally is in the first 2 months of life, so we're almost at that point. I can tell myself that I don't have to feel bad about this--lots of babies are raised on formula and do just fine--but I feel horrible about stopping! This is the hardest part for me--the GUILT.

My thought has been to stop at the 2 month point (in about a week or so). I really need to figure out how to be confident with that decision and not cave in about renting the pump for another month. Stopping now or in a month, I don't know that that extra month will really truly benefit him. I just don't know.

I'll have another update in a week or so when Jackson hits the 2 month mark! It'll be about HIM, my little prince, and not all about me. ☺