Computer woes

Oh, what is with the computer issues I've had this year??!  First, Paul bought me a new refurbished netbook for Mother's Day.  The old one was slow and many years old (a hand-me-down from my uncle to my mom to me).  The new one is the same maker (Acer), and after the first week, the hard drive crashed!  Took a complete dump.  Thankfully, it was under warranty so I sent it back and they reinstalled what it had on it originally. 

A month later, my desktop, a spiffy 2.5 year old doozy that worked like a charm, also bit the dust.  The motherboard was the problem on that one, and sadly it was no longer under warranty.  Paul thought it might be one simple thing, but when he took it to Tiger Direct, they told him it was D-E-A-D dead as a door knob.  He, being the amazing husband he is, bought me a new one right there in their store. 

Two days ago, I made a HUGE error in clicking on something I shouldn't have (which I'm smart enough to know not to do!).  Yesterday, I attempted to turn on the computer, and it was dead.  I was OUT OF MY MIND pissed.  I mean, how many times can this really happen to me?  After a lot of hours spent trying to restore, save, backup....we finally had to reinstall Windows, but thankfully, by some miracle from somewhere, everything was backed up and came back--I was terrified of losing my photos from this past year, which were not backed up (but are now!!), but they're all on there.  The only thing that didn't transfer was Microsoft Office, which sucks, but my photos are intact.  Crisis averted.  *whew*

In other news, Paul and I met today with our coordinator for Jackson's therapies and a representative from the preschool in town where he'll attend.  Jackson is currently in speech, developmental, and (soon-to-be) occupational, but he only receives these services until he turns 3.  Literally, up to that day and not a minute after.  Well, some of them he might be able to continue at the preschool, specifically speech which is our main area of concern.  He'll have an evaluation in November, followed by a meeting for a decision on whether or not he'll need to continue.  My guess is, he'll be recommended for speech and will qualify for their walk-in speech clinic, which would basically be once a week for about 30-45 minutes.  Not much time, but I'll take whatever they throw my way.

That's all for now!  Happy Fall!  (is it really happy??!)

Moving on

I'm feeling a bit better since my last post.  *Whew*

I have a cold.  I felt really yucky yesterday, but I'm much better today, and I know tomorrow will be even better.

My 25th high school reunion is this Saturday night.  I bought a ticket a few months ago (mainly because it was cheaper then than it is now), and truth be told, I'm a little excited to go.  I've been friends on Facebook with a lot of people from HS, most of whom I wasn't really friends with back then.  It's been nice getting reacquainted with these people--getting a glimpse into their lives now, and knowing how much we've all changed, many for the better.  Should be a good time!

I have a few weeks off from babysitting.  I feel like it's a vacation.  I really needed a break from it.

Jackson is deeply entrenched in his therapies now--speech and developmental, with occupational starting soon as well.  The therapists are all really nice, though the speech therapist is really the most hard core.  MAN, she has an agenda and makes sure Jackson sticks to it!  She's all business, while the DT is a lot more relaxed and lets him do whatever he wants.  I don't mind though, because speech is his biggest problem area.  We've seen a lot of improvement, though I don't know how much of it can be attributed to the therapy.  It's certainly not hurting him though!

I need something--a change of some sort.  I miss having something to do on a regular basis, like bowling or working.  I miss hanging out with other people.  I miss being skinny (or skinnier) and feeling better about myself.  *sigh*

On my winter to do list: clean my office, paint my office, sell more stuff online and on eBay, potty train Jackson, switch Jackson to a big boy bed.  Probably more, but I can't think of it all right now.

Off to shower, then play some Angry Birds, then hit the hay.

Dumps

It's been a rough couple of weeks for me.  I've been very down-in-the-dumps.  I can't really pinpoint the reason why---likely a combination of things including the change in seasons, my lack of fertility, and just a general malaise about life. 

Everything's fine at home: my marriage is doing well, my son is still a joy (for being almost 3).  But I'm finding myself unhappy at times.

I hate winter.  Maybe I have Seasonal Affective Disorder.

Sometimes it hits me that I'll never be pregnant again, and Jackson will never have a sibling.  I hear about friends/family getting pregnant, and while I'm elated for them, there's an edge of sadness there that haunts me and I can't escape.

I babysit (just 2 days a week for a total of 8-9 hours), and while the kids are cute, I'm not really happy doing this anymore.  It's hard handling two 2 year olds and an almost-7 month old.  I don't get paid very much (I'm helping out a friend) and maybe I'm a little bitter about that.

I feel like I've lost touch with most of my close friends.  I miss my friends.  I miss talking to people, going out and doing things (not that I've ever done much of that).  I miss teaching, and working with people.

I feel underappreciated.  I know my husband loves me, and my son does too (most of the time).  I feel like I'm boring to others, like no one really gives a shit about me.  On the other hand, I feel like there's not much for others to really give a shit about.

Sorry for my dumpy post.  I thought maybe typing it all out would help.  Maybe it's time for me to revisit the fabulous Colleen.  I wouldn't even know where to start though.

Blah.  Better days ahead, no?